Pretty stressful/shitty week, but I guess its nice to have my papers finished.
I still ended up going to bed at 3 in the morning every night even though I was generally avoiding the internet. I just had no motivation to do anything. Yeah, I guess it’s nice to get stuff done early, but what’s the point when there is nothing to do later? A week without school is nice and all, but I’m not actually going to do anything, so I didn’t really care about getting anything done.
so I’m not sure how to say this, or if I even want to, but a few days ago I found out that my brother was physically assaulted, and I guess he was hurt pretty bad. That just killed me. He was apparently at some party with a bunch of kids he didn’t know in a bad suburb and supposedly some kid attacked him unprovoked. He lost a few teeth and got his face pretty screwed up.
It’s been pretty hard to deal with. I know for a fact my brother has made some bad decisions in his life, so its hard not to blame him for this. Being at a late night party where he doesn’t know anyone is a pretty stupid thing, but it shouldn’t be his fault. The fact that someone just attacked him is appalling. Jesus, my brother is like half my size despite being two years younger. And that they laid a bunch of punches on him straight to the head and enough to knock out some teeth is just ridiculous.
god, knowing someone would attack your younger brother is terrifying. I grew up with the fucking kid, and yeah, our relationship has kind of deteriorated over the years, but its sickening knowing what this kid did to him. And that it was your younger brother, you know the one you are supposed to protect and be a role model for. just reminds me that i’ve been a terrible older brother.
i was also told that when the police were investigating they couldn’t find out who did it because nobody admitted to it or would even tell them who did it. i mean, jesus fucking christ, in the middle of a party some guy attacks a defenseless smaller kid and NOBODY can say what happened?
thank fucking god we have decent health insurance or else i probably would have had my transfer papers in or would have had to drop out. i mean, we are talking about a crime here, this other kid should be behind bars and nobody can admit who it was and the police can’t figure it out? god damn, my brother was in the fucking hospital and lost teeth and needs a shitload of dental work.
for those who still don’t know how fucked up our society is, my brother can get the shit beat out of him and sent to the hospital while the criminal goes unpunished, but i download a few hours of music and I get some e-mail from ITS about how mediacom is going to fine me 250,000 and that I could spend 5 years in jail if I get caught again. YEAH. GREAT FUCKING LAWS WE HAVE IN THIS SOCIETY.
jesus christ, 4 fucking hours of music for personal listening and they flip a shit over it yet when my brother gets permanently harmed the cops can’t do shit about it.
i just fucking hate everybody and everything.
and its not about demanding justice or anything, its the fact that it HAPPENED. for god’s fucking sake its my little brother. he didn’t stand a chance and jesus you just couldn’t fucking stop or nobody else had the morals to step in? absolutely disgusting.
i hate everything. fuck it all.